How Long Does It Take?

As long as it takes; that’s how long it takes. It’s not about forgetting. It’s about hurting.

And I know that if I am alive twenty years from now, and I happen to look at a blue sky with puffy clouds and think of my son, Fred—and figure how old he’d be, what he’d be doing and what his children would be doing—I’ll hurt.

And know that if I can switch my train of thought from what is not, to what was, a happy memory, I’ll be able to smile through the tears. We don’t stop hurting, ever. But so many things occur each day. So many events and thoughts and happenings intervene, that our focus is shifted. The death of our child changes from the main concern in our life, to one of many.

A life may stop; but the loving goes on. To love deeply is to be vulnerable…for all our days.

Joan S. ~ TCF, Central Jersey Chapter

Find a Local Chapter

Use the chapter locator to find out information about chapters in your area. Locate a Chapter by selecting your state and zip code.

Sign Up for the Compassionate Friends Newsletter

  • Phone: 877.969.0010
© 2024 The Compassionate Friends. Privacy Policy
This site was donated by the Open to Hope Foundation in loving memory of Scott Preston Horsley.
BBB Accredited Charity Best America Independent Charities of America 2012 Top Ten Grief & Loss