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First Mother’s Day

I remember vividly the first Mother’s Day after my son died. Had there been a vote that year, I would have cast mine for the abolition of Mother’s Day. I didn’t want there to be such a day and I…

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Speaking from the Heart

As a country music fan, and a singer and songwriter who has lived in Nashville, I always loved the Hank Williams Jr. song “All My Rowdy Friends (Have Settled Down).” For those of you who may not be familiar with the song, the title pretty much says…

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Making Mother’s Day and Father’s Day Special

Here are a few hints to help you through these days after the loss of a child. Pamper yourself-this is a special day in your life. You are a parent forever and your child is your child forever. Do what…

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Create a Memory Garden

The physical activity of working and tending to a garden can give comfort and quiet time to remember the special memories that you once shared. Creating a memory garden will help you feel closer to those you lost and create…

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How Long Does It Take?

As long as it takes; that’s how long it takes. It’s not about forgetting. It’s about hurting. And I know that if I am alive twenty years from now, and I happen to look at a blue sky with puffy…

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From the Ashes of Grief

In the early morning fog of a spring day The sunlight drifts slowly across the lake Lifting the dark shadows of night. The honking geese frolic in the early morning rays of sunshine While the birds sing of promises yet…

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Somehow It’s Spring

It’s spring in some places now. And in some places it will be winter for another couple of weeks (months?). Somewhere the tulips are beginning to push through the soft earth and somewhere the birds are returning to sing. Somewhere…

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Even in the Darkness there is Light

When your child died, you were thrown into the dark night of the soul. You can hide in fear and despair or you can make friends with the darkness. Begin on a clear, starry night. Preferably, not when it is…

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Helping Others Help You – Ten Rules for Self-Healing

Tell friends to call you often. Explain that after the first couple of months you‟ll need their calls. Tell your friends to make a specific date with you; none of this “we must get together for lunch”. Remind them that…

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