A sudden accident killed your child.
That terrible phone call changed your life
with no warning – you didn’t get to say goodbye –
this has to be the most terrible loss of all.
Your child died by suicide –
you feel you should have been able to prevent it.
Your guilt is devastating.
How can you live with such an incomprehensible tragedy?
You only had one child –
now you have none and your focus in life is gone.
What’s the point of living?
What could be more devastating?
You’ve experienced the deaths of more than
one of your children – will it happen again?
How does one survive this pain again?
When your baby died, your dreams died
you have few memories and you’re too
young to be suffering like this – this loss
is the most unfair.
Someone murdered your child – an
unbelievable violation – you’re angry and your frustration
with the legal system feeds your anger.
This must be the very worst.
You’re a single parent – your child has
died and you have no one to lean on, no
one to share your grief – surely your
suffering is the most painful.
The unbelievable has happened – your
adult child died – you had invested so
much in that child – now who’s going to
care for you in your old age?
You had to watch your child suffer
bravely through a long illness –
you were helpless to ease his pain and to prevent his death –
how do you erase those horrible images?
Yours must be the greatest grief.
The truth is that the death of any child is
the greatest loss, regardless of the cause, regardless of the age.
Our own experience is far more painful than we had ever previously envisioned,
so how could we possibly comprehend what others have undergone.
To make comparisons between our own suffering and the pain of others is an exercise in futility. It accomplishes nothing and sometimes can be hurtful to others. To say that one type of death produces a greater or deeper grief than another tends to place different values on the children who have died.
Each child is worth 100% of our grief, each person’s sorrow is 100% and each loss is 100% of our being. I can’t imagine wanting to walk in the shoes of any other bereaved parent, can you?
Use the chapter locator to find out information about chapters in your area. Locate a Chapter by selecting your state and zip code.