My son Louis was 15 when he was killed on that cold, yet sunny December 20, 1993. Louis was going to a Christmas party for the group he belonged to called Teens Against Gang Violence and was caught in the crossfire between two rival gangs. In his young age, he had dreams, goals, and visions: He wanted to be the nation’s first black and youngest president. He always believed that “if true peace is to be achieved, it will be up to my generation, regardless of which side of the street they come from.” And it is because of the love for my son and for my living children, Alexandra and Allen, and a strong belief in my faith, that I knew his life could not end there on the streets, that this young black child’s life was worth more. The question then moved from “Why me, God?” to “What do you have in store for me today, God?”
I remember Louis asking me if he was a problem child. He could not understand why the adults were always blaming the children for the violence. He did not vote, he did not make the laws, he did not have a job, he did not drive a car, yet he and his peers were being blamed for the violence that was in our communities. I remember him saying, “I was born into this mess.” Louis was very concerned that if things did not change, his friends would all be addicted to drugs, dead, or in jail, and he would not have his peers to lead with him in his administration. Louis believed in peace, and it would be up to his generation. His message to his peers was, “Work smart, not hard, and always be the best you can, and not what others expect to see.”
I wanted to learn more about peace. What is peace? Mother Teresa said, “If you want peace, go home and hug your children.” This simple response made my heart smile, for me it was that simple . . . I knew that I was on the right path. My questions continued . . . What does peace look like? What does peace feel like? What does peace sound like? What does peace taste like? Who is speaking and teaching peace?
In his book, Peace Is the Way, Deepak Chopra, tells us that “living in peace, one breathes easily.” There is space to allow for connections with other people. Arguments proceed with mutual respect for either side. Mahatma Gandhi, Nelson Mandela, Martin Luther King, and Mother Teresa have lived different aspects of peace. We learned from each that the way of peace can end suffering and oppression, not by warring against an enemy, but by bearing witness to wrongs, and by allowing sympathy and common humanity to do their patient work. He continues by saying, “The way of peace isn’t based on religion or morality. It doesn’t ask us to become saints overnight or to renounce our feelings of anger or our thirst for revenge. What it asks for is something new: conscious evolution. The way of peace is love in action. Instead of wishing that others would stop killing, you can become a force for peace, and in so doing make the ultimate contribution.”
The day Louis was killed is the day that I woke up. God teaches us that all children are born with a core of goodness within; research tells us that children who have been hurt or harmed, often grow up to harm others, especially when their pain and anger are left unresolved and without a safe space to process the many emotions and feelings that come with grief. As the mother of a murdered child, I must struggle with the good and evil within me and the injustice that continues to play out daily in urban communities. I must make a daily choice. I pray, Dear God, please give me the courage to choose peace today, and after my prayer, I often read the story of two wolves: An old Cherokee was teaching his grandson about life. “A fight is going on inside me,” he said to the boy. “It is a terrible fight and it is between two wolves. One is evil—he is anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego.”
He continued, “The other is good—he is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith. The same fight is going on inside you—and inside every other person, too.” The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather, “Which wolf will win?” The old Cherokee simply replied, “The one you feed.” I made a personal choice that I would feed myself God’s peace, and the angry wolf in me would share the message of peace . . . both inner and outer peace.
Today I am blessed with a team, and I lead a ministry called the Louis D. Brown Peace Institute, which serves as a center of healing, teaching, and learning. The foundation of our mission rests on the active use of the seven principles of peace: love, unity, faith, hope, courage, justice, and forgiveness.
Committed to restorative justice theories, the Peace Institute provides programs, training, and services that are thorough and relevant with a multicultural lens. We do this in three ways: Programs are developed to instill peace in school and community settings; support is provided to survivors of homicide victims and the families of perpetrators; and, finally, training is provided to mental health providers, criminal justice professionals, and faith leaders working with youth and families impacted by violence. We invite you to join us on this journey toward peace.
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