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Articles by Anna Silvernail

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Living When You Don’t Want To

I can recall with perfect clarity the exact moment when I first realized I wanted to die. It was four weeks to the day after our daughter had passed. It was also our 20th wedding anniversary—a fact that was totally…

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Grief Multiplied

One loss does not prepare you for another. My father passed away last week. He was 77 years old. He had a pacemaker, a bevy of unhealthy habits, and an assortment of health issues. And none of that made his loss…

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Ghost Town

I live in another woman’s house. I drive another woman’s car. I wear her clothes and sleep in her bed. Sometimes, I stand in her closet and finger her jewelry and think things like, Why so many necklaces? and Where…

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I am Angry

Feeling the anger today, hot and pulsing in my veins. I am angry she is gone. I am angry for everything she isn’t getting to do, everything she was robbed of. I am angry all her hard work, and mine…

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Accommodating Grief

Every day, I make accommodations for this grief. Every. Single. Day. Without exception. On a “good” day, that might look like excusing myself to the bathroom at work where I can cry in private, if only for a few minutes,…

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